


Losing Heart

by llewynn



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Law Dies, Post-Dressrosa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:02:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24076408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/llewynn/pseuds/llewynn
Summary: Trafalgar Law did not survive Dressrosa. Someone has to tell the Heart Pirates.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	1. The Straw Hats

**Author's Note:**

> Brought to you by my emotional fixation on the fact that Trafalgar Law _was ready to die in Dressrosa_ , and wondering if the Heart Pirates knew that he was going to leave them all behind.
> 
> Un-beta'd.

None of them were strangers to death. None of them were blind to the reality of the world that they lived in; that as pirates, any day could truly be their last. With how easily their captain pitted himself up against the monsters of the New World, from Warlords of the Seas to Marine Admirals, Pacifistas to Celestial Dragons and the World Government, the Straw Hats knew well the danger they were in. Faith wasn’t always enough. Their strength wouldn’t always be enough. There would always be someone whose strength would far surpass theirs.

There would always be the chance… that one of them, either from the crew or their allies, would die.

They just never thought it would be Trafalgar Law.

\--

He went to his death smiling. He had already suffered through injuries that would have killed a regular person — gunshot wounds, broken bones, severe blood loss from a torn-off right arm… it was a miracle he’d survived so long, long enough to land a debilitating blow to Doflamingo. Long enough to seriously wound Trebol with Sterben. Long enough to try and get himself and Luffy away from Trebol’s flammable mucous with Shambles. 

Long enough to take a direct hit to the chest from Doflamingo’s Overheat.

He was already dead when Robin caught him in her Spider Web.

“I’d never seen him smile,” Robin later said to Zoro and Franky, hushed in the dark of the night as Luffy and the others slept off their exhaustion. “Not truly,” Robin added, “not until then.”

“Did he know he wasn’t going to make it out alive?” Franky wondered. 

Robin nodded. “It’s likely.”

Zoro said nothing. Two years ago in Loguetown, Luffy had almost gotten himself executed by Buggy the Clown. Luffy had smiled back then too, still so cavalier and cheerful when he was so close to losing his life.

“That’s not it.” 

The other two turned to look at him. “What do you mean?” asked Robin.

“It’s not that he knew he wasn’t going to make it out alive.” Zoro looked pensive. “It’s that he never planned to survive fighting Doflamingo in the first place.”

Franky sucked in a shocked breath. Robin similarly looked startled. 

“He was going to kill Doflamingo or die trying.” Franky said.

“...yeah.” 

Doflamingo wasn’t even dead. Killing had never been Luffy’s style, after all. It might have been Zoro’s, it might have been Robin’s; if it had been either of them, Doflamingo might not still be alive. 

But it was Luffy who landed the finishing blow on Doflamingo, and so it was that the former Warlord was now under Marine captivity. Battered to hell and back, but alive.

Dressrosa was freed. Doflamingo had been defeated, and Trafalgar Law was dead.

“I’ll say one thing though.” Zoro’s quiet voice snapped the other two out of their thoughts. He took a deep swig from the bottle in his hand, and sighed as he set the empty bottle down.

“I’m not looking forward to telling the Heart Pirates that their captain’s dead.”

Robin and Franky simultaneously paled.

\--

They buried Law on Flower Hill, near the royal palace where he lost his life, in a small, nondescript grave. His nodachi was planted beside the headstone bearing his name, his hat hung on the hilt. 

Luffy spent a long time there before they left Dressrosa.

\--

The mood was sombre aboard the Going Luffy. Even Bartolomeo, rowdy devoted fan of the Straw Hats as he were, knew enough to keep quiet. They reached Zou with little fanfare; it didn’t feel right to do anything else than say goodbye to the Barto Club and go aboard the Sunny before climbing up Zou, so that’s what they did.

As the available crew went through the ship, preparing for their climb, a shout rang from inside the men’s cabin. 

“What is it?” Franky yelled from the deck where he was checking the ship’s mast. 

“Guys, look!” Usopp dashed out, an envelope in his hand. “Trafal-guy left this in our cabin.” 

The Straw Hats along with Kinemon and Kanjuro gathered around Usopp. On the envelope was written, in Law’s surprisingly haphazard handwriting: _For my crew._

Silence fell over the group. Without a word, Luffy plucked the envelope from Usopp’s grip and slipped it into his pack. “I’ll tell the Heart Pirates about Trafal-guy,” he said quietly.

“Will you be okay, Luffy?” Robin asked. 

Luffy nodded, then turned towards Zou. 

“Let’s go.”


	2. Shachi

“Tell me this isn’t real, Straw Hat.”

The Heart Pirates weren’t as well known as their captain for their strength, but it didn’t mean they were pushovers. The two Guardians who had attacked Straw Hat for trespassing the Whale Forest were crumpled on the ground, groaning. There were more Guardians laying in wait around them, Shachi could tell, but their leader seemed to understand the gravity of the situation. He’d made sure of that. 

They wouldn’t interfere. Not with this.

Penguin brandished the newspaper, crumpled and battered from how often they’d gone through it, scouring the pages to understand what had happened to their captain. To find a grain of hope despite the blaring headline on the front page—

_“Trafalgar Law dead in clash between Warlords”_

“Tell me this isn’t real!” Penguin snarled at the other pirate. Straw Hat Luffy stared at them inscrutably, looking none for worse from the brief skirmish he’d had with the Guardians, before Jean Bart and Bepo had stepped in.

After a tense silence, Straw Hat closed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m sorry,” he said.

Blood rushed through Shachi’s head as his heart dropped like an anvil. “Fuck you!” Jean Bart roared, startling the Guardians. Birds burst out from the treetops, fleeing the Forest. “Fuck you, Straw Hat! Don’t you fucking dare say you’re sorry!”

“I’m sorry,” Straw Hat repeated. His hands were curled into tight fists.

“What happened, Straw Hat?” Bepo, this time, quieter than he’d ever heard the bear Mink speak. “How did our captain die?”

Shachi didn’t want to hear it. 

“He took a blow from Doflamingo while he was trying to get us to safety.”

No. 

“It was too fast.”

It couldn’t be true.

“I couldn’t do anything.”

Beside him, Penguin vanished in a blur as he rushed at Straw Hat, landing a fist to the face that sent Straw Hat crashing into a tree, to the shocked cries of the gathered Guardians. Straw Hat lay there, unmoving, as Penguin rained blow upon blow on him. 

Jean Bart and Bepo watched, the gargantuan man’s body heaving with barely suppressed rage. Bepo had a blank look on his face that would have made Shachi worry for him, if he had the capacity for any function right now. As it is, he could barely bring himself to stop Penguin.

It came to Shachi then, unbidden: the captain should be here. If he was here, he would have stopped Penguin. He’d always told them to conserve their strength and to seem weaker than they really were, so that other people would underestimate them. And he wouldn’t show it, but he would have been proud of how far Penguin had come from the kid who’d lost an arm because he couldn’t throw a bomb fast enough. 

He must be proud. He must be. Penguin was here and Penguin was beating the crap out of Straw Hat and Straw Hat was so strong, and Shachi didn’t even know Penguin had Haki. Did the captain know? He must have. He knew everything. Penguin was being badass and Bepo was looking like the world just ended (hadn’t it?) and the captain wouldn’t stand for this, the captain wouldn’t let anyone hurt Bepo, the captain cared for them (didn’t he?) and there was no way he would leave them just like this...

The thought ran through his mind, pell-mell and distraught, mixed-up and twisted and despairing, and when it all finally made sense — there was a sound.

A strangled, hacking mess of a sound, like a scream that stuck at the back of your throat. Like the wailings of a drowned man. Like a man choking on grief and disbelief and the hundred thousand ways the world isn’t real, _because this can't be real—_

“Shachi.” Warm hands on his face, a familiar smell tinged with rust. Penguin in front of him now, Penguin with his bloody hands on Shachi’s face, pale and shaking. Penguin, who’d been the only person he’d had for so long, the only person in his life before Bepo and the captain came along. 

Then warmth on his back, thick fur tickling the back of his neck. Heavy paws around his waist and a trembling voice: “Shachi, please stop.”

Stop what? What was there to stop? The world had stopped making sense when it said Trafalgar Law was dead. There was a sound that went on and on, and the Guardians still surrounding them stood there with pity in their eyes, and Straw Hat was still just _watching when he let the captain die—_

Oh. 

Shachi stopped.

\--

They didn’t find out until the third day.

Either the Minks had tried to keep the news from them, or they were still so exhausted after recovering from the poison gas that Jack had used to attack the dukedom, reading the newspapers had been the last thing on their minds. 

But it wasn’t until three days after headlines proclaimed Dressrosa’s liberation and the defeat of the Donquixote Doflamingo and his criminal empire that Uni eventually managed to scrounge the willpower to ask for a newspaper from the Minks – to a reluctance that had seemed only mildly suspicious then, but all too clear in hindsight now. 

But they needed to know; they needed to find out what had happened to their captain. If their captain was alright.

If their captain was coming back.

Instead, they found Trafalgar Law’s death. 

There wasn’t anything they could do. The members of the Straw Hat crew that had arrived to save them from the poison gas confirmed that they last saw him alive and in combat against Doflamingo, although they later found out that he had been shot and captured. What happened afterwards, they didn’t know.

That was a ray of hope, then. Captured wasn’t dead. Captured meant a fighting chance, and everyone knew the newspapers were in the World Government’s pocket. Newspapers lied all the time. That’s what the captain said.

They had to wait. On tenterhooks and with fraying tempers, in terrible anger and leaden doubt and bone-deep _fear_ , holding on to hope against all odds— 

That was the only thing they could do.

So the Heart Pirates waited, and for the first time for many — they prayed for a lie.

\-- 

He couldn’t remember moving. He remembered scenes, like a disjointed film all cut up and mixed together:

Straw Hat reaching into his pocket and handing over something to Penguin.

Penguin spitting at Straw Hat’s foot, then turning to march into the forest.

A paw curled up in his hand, pulling him along.

Jean Bart’s voice, muffled and distant, but reverberating with disdain and anger.

He could remember feeling the Guardians around them, lined up as they made their way deeper into the forest, like an honour guard for the fallen.

He remembered coming into the clearing where the rest of the crew were gathered, anxious and afraid.

Ikkaku’s scream. The tears. The cries of disbelief. The crew jostling Penguin, angry and upset and distraught, begging him to prove them wrong.

Some of the crew came to him and Bepo too, but he couldn’t muster the words. That the captain was _dead_ —he couldn’t say it. It wouldn’t let him. He sank to the ground, then, and did the only thing he could do:

He cried.


	3. Penguin

They were older brothers, the both of them. 

Law never spoke about her much, the little sister who’d died in a hospital in Flevance, burned alive and alone and in hope. Her name was Lami, she had the gummiest smile Law had ever seen, and she died young. That was all Penguin knew about her.

But even before Law told him bits and pieces of his life before Swallow Island, he’d recognised a kindred spirit in the other boy then. Law was a mess when they first met — they all were — but there was a natural instinct to protect that was all too familiar to Penguin, not least when Law chose to protect a bullied little Mink years younger than him. It was as easy as breathing: Law would beat up anyone who hurt Bepo, just as Penguin would move heaven and earth to keep Shachi safe.

That was what big brothers do.

When two and two became four and the Heart Pirates were formed, there had been a question of seniority then, made jokingly by Shachi. Of the four of them, Penguin was undoubtedly the eldest, but it was Law who had the right to take the role of captain, given that he was the only one who’d had experience being any sort of pirate at all; Shachi and Penguin were small-town delinquents, and Bepo was more an accidental runaway than a bonafide sailor. 

“Become my first mate, then,” Law had said, and shrugged when Penguin cast him a sideways glance. It was the night before they were due to set sail, and stars had blanketed the sky as they sat on the deck of the submarine, then still unnamed. “You’re good at taking care of people.”

“Is that what a first mate does?” Penguin had asked back, skeptical.

Law just smiled. “The first mate takes care of everyone. Even the captain.” His smile dimmed a little, the way it always did when he was forcing himself. Penguin hated that smile. “The pirate crew I was with before had executive officers instead of a first mate, but they’re really the same thing.” 

They fell silent for a while, listening to the waves lapping at the sides of the submarine. Penguin pretended not to notice the furtive looks Law was sending his way. 

“It’ll suit you, being first mate,” Law said. 

“Because I’m good at taking care of people?”

“Because you’re our big brother.” 

At Penguin’s flabbergasted look, Law had shrugged again, this time a quicker hitch of his shoulders that didn’t quite manage to hide the blush spreading across his pale face. He scowled and looked away. 

“It’s true,” he’d said, pulling his hat down over his eyes. “You’re the oldest out of all of us. Bepo and Shachi listen to you when they don’t listen to me, and you know I’m no good at taking care of people.”

Law fiddled with the brim of his hat some more. “And if you’re my first mate,” he added, quietly enough that Penguin had to lean closer to hear, “I know I can ask for your help whenever I’m in trouble.”

Penguin stared at him. Law peeked up at him from underneath his hat, uncharacteristically nervous, and then it struck him — for all that Law had been a pint-sized powerhouse when they first met, with his overwhelming strength and incredible intellect, Law was still just a thirteen year old kid then. Sixteen now, but he still needed someone to look out for him.

Just as Penguin had been doing.

And for all that Penguin was only two years older, the realization that Law looked to him as an elder brother — someone Law could rely on — struck him to the core. Law had always seemed so powerful and untouchable, with his Devil Fruit powers and horrible, traumatic life experiences that made him older than his years, and to realize that he was someone important and dependable to such a person…

Penguin reached out a hand and bopped Law on the head, eliciting a dismayed cry of “What the hell, Penguin!” that devolved into the kind of roughhousing Law would never have willingly taken part in before, but that he now did with a strange kind of joy on his face.

He couldn’t say anything. 

There wasn’t anything to say. 

\--

He was supposed to look out for them.

He was the first mate. The big brother of the crew. Even to the captain.

Especially to the captain.

\--

They parted ways on a small, nondescript island some distance away from Punk Hazard. The _Polar Tang_ would refuel and restock before making its way to Zou, while the captain would make his way to the destroyed island on a boat by himself. The Heart Pirates had docked four days ago; now it was time for them to leave.

On the eve of their departure, Penguin found the captain standing inside the operating room of a ruined hospital. He’d raised his head at the sound of Penguin’s booted footsteps, the sound echoing throughout the hollowed walls, and there was a look on his face that Penguin had never seen before.

It was melancholy, and desperation, and a longing in his eyes so strong that it felt like the captain had been committing his face to memory, as if he would never see Penguin again, and did he already know then? Known that he was going to leave them to die?

Not Penguin. Not when he’d called out to the captain and said they were ready to leave, and the captain had the most broken look on his face then. Not when they’d made their way out of the operating room and walked down the rotting hallways, with mildewed walls and shattered windows and faint bloodstains on the wooden floors. Not when Penguin eventually spoke up, his attention arrested by the tense set of his captain’s shoulders.

“You’re going to be okay, cap… Law?” 

There was the slightest hesitation, a break in his stride before the captain stopped to turn back to him. “Worried about me, Penguin?” he’d said then, a feigned sort of amusement playing on his face.

“I’m the first mate, aren’t I?” Penguin had shot back. “It’s my job to worry about you.”

The captain’s smile had widened imperceptibly, but there was a flash of something he now knew to be desolation in the captain’s eyes. “I’ll be fine,” he’d said.

Even then, there had been something that alerted Penguin to the lie. “I know you’re strong, Law,” he said, somehow suddenly struck by a desperate need to make his captain _understand_. “But you don’t have to do this alone. You know we’ve got your back, don’t you?”

“I know.” The smile on the captain’s face was genuine now. “I’m lucky to have you.” 

Before Penguin could say anything else, Bepo and Shachi thundered up the hallway towards them, both jostling each other and yelling for the captain, and then they were waving goodbye as they left the little island. 

The sight of their captain, left behind to walk into the lion’s den all by himself, was the last time any of them saw him alive.

\--

It wasn’t Straw Hat who’d failed to save their captain.

It was him.

\--

With all that’s left of the captain in his shaking, bloody hands (it was Straw Hat’s blood, it was _Law’s_ , it was his _little brother's_ —), Penguin opened the envelope and began to read out loud.


End file.
